Bob Reccord believes that after God has invited you to a personal relationship with Him through Jesus Christ, He then calls you to a personal mission alongside Him to impact your world. The questions listed here focus on maximizing your marriage and are excerpted (with permission) from Beneath the Surface by Bob Reccord, a book designed to guide you in guarding your heart and steering clear of the dangers that could leave you, and your family, shipwrecked.
A. Husbands, ask your wives:
- Do you know that I truly love you, and do I make it obvious? If not, what can I do to improve that?
- Do you feel that I express my love to you enough in front of the children so there’s no question in their mind of my love for you? If not, how can I improve it?
- Am I treating you as the most important person on earth to me? What could increase that feeling in you?
- I promised to cherish you. Do you feel that way, and what could I do to strengthen that?
- What is your greatest concern about our family, and have you felt free to express it to me? If you’ve expressed it, have I listened?
- Do you feel that I’m helping you fulfill your God-given potential? How can I improve that?
- Am I doing anything that would ever lead you to be tempted to compromise in any area? If so, what could I do to change?
- Would you tell me your most significant dreams about the future?
B. Wives, ask your husbands:
- Am I doing enough to make you feel adequate in our relationship and assuring you that I see you that way?
- I know it’s important for you to feel honoured and affirmed. Do I make you feel that way, and what can I do to improve?
- How can I help you best succeed at your work as you provide for the needs of our family?
- Do you feel that I know and understand what your greatest dreams are for the future?
- What could I do better to support your leadership in our family?
- Am I doing anything that would ever lead you to be tempted to compromise in any area? If so, what could I do to change?
C. Together, discuss the following:
- How do you feel we’re doing in expressing our own personal faith as a living reality in front of our kids?
- Are we sometimes allowing our children to play one of us against the other, and if so, what adjustments do we need to make to avoid that?
- Are we praying for our children’s future and for the mates God is preparing for them?
- Do our children understand that our marriage relationship is the priority in our family?
- How are we each doing individually and together as a couple on building our spiritual lives?
- Is the atmosphere of our home one that is filled with joy and expectation? If not, what adjustments need to be made?
- What are we doing to make sure that we are growing together, as opposed to growing apart?