FocusOnTheFamily

Seinfeld versus the Bible: What’s the best way to give Christmas gifts?

Written by Stephen Johnson

On the Christmas 1997 episode of the Seinfeld TV show, George, Elaine and Jerry were each given a card informing them that instead of receiving a gift, a donation had been made in their name to a charitable organization. George was outraged – at first. But then, copying the idea behind the cards, he came up with a non-existent charity called The Human Fund as a way to avoid actual gift giving. It was a clever and humourous episode that raised the question of whether donating to charities might be a better alternative to traditional Christmas gifts.

A few years ago, a close friend of mine decided that Christmas had become far too commercial. For him, gift giving had turned ugly and his children really didn’t need anything since they not only had everything they needed, but had too much of it. Instead, he decided to give money to a charity that year and suggested that others consider doing the same.

Since I was a pastor, I’m sure my friend thought I’d support this idea and would start a movement within our church. But when he told me about it, something didn’t sit well with me about the whole approach, but it took me a while to figure out what it was.

After all, his two problems with traditional gift giving were true. I agree that we should be giving to charities, though I also think we should be supporting charities all year, not just at Christmas. I also agree that much of Christmas has become too commercial. Many of us do have an abundance of stuff that we don’t really need.

So if I agreed, what was my problem with my friend’s suggestion? As the pastor, why wouldn’t I encourage our church to do something that appeared wise, thoughtful and perhaps even righteous?

First, one size doesn’t fit all. I’ve learned in life to always ask the question, “What does God say?” In John 21, Jesus had a lunch with the disciples. Asking Peter to follow him, Jesus took him aside. Peter turned, saw John following them and asked Jesus, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus basically told Peter that it was none of his business and replied, “What is that to you? You must follow me.”

If the Lord wants my friend to conduct his giving a certain way, it doesn’t mean I ought to apply that as a standard to others. Also, God’s Word teaches me that how I give is a private matter between the Lord and me, “not letting my left hand know what my right is doing,” and certainly not broadcasting it publicly as the Pharisees did (Matthew 6:1-4).

I’m also instructed by 2 Corinthians 9:7 – which is about generous giving – that “each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give.”

Second, I realized that my friend’s focus wasn’t on giving, but on getting. While he wasn’t thinking about getting for himself, he was so focused on his children’s getting that he missed out on his own giving.

The passage in 2 Corinthians reminded me that we’re to give “cheerfully” and beyond that, to also give generously. Wouldn’t it be much better, at least in my case, instead of giving to either a charity or my children, to find a way to do both, generously? How could I include my children in that giving? How could I teach them that Christmas is about giving, not getting? What if we banned lists of what we want, and replaced them with the wonder and excitement of what we might give to family and friends? And how could I give to my children in a way that brings them a deeper understanding of the Lord’s love for us?
As parents, we need to ask the Lord for wisdom in spending the resources He gives us on our kids. In this way, we’ll truly bring joy to our children as we reflect the love our Heavenly Father has for us.

Christmas is the season for celebrating the incredible gift of our Saviour, freely given to us by God our Father. How can we, as families and as churches, best celebrate this most special of all gifts? By demonstrating, through our gifts to our own children and communities, the love God has for His children in giving His only Son.

Stephen Johnson is the director of world view training at Focus on the Family Canada.

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