FocusOnTheFamily

Kerith Creek: A place of healing for church leaders

It all started in 2008 when Focus on the Family Canada opened Kerith Creek near Calgary, Alta., and began retreats for single and married church leaders. These ministry retreats were – and still are – a seven-day period of rest, small group teaching, healing and counselling.

Jerry and Renee Ritskes, the pastoral leaders at Kerith Creek, bring their own experience of more than 25 years of ministry. Now, reflecting over the last few years of ministering to pastors, missionaries and other Christian leaders, they share a bit of what it’s like to serve at Kerith Creek.

“We came to Kerith Creek primarily because we experienced a retreat with Sonscape Retreats, which later became the model for Kerith Creek,” says Jerry. “I was in real need of refreshment and hope. We had experienced some difficult things in ministry and I felt ‘used up.’ I felt like God was finished with me. It was a scary and confusing time.”

During this time, while Renee was very supportive of Jerry, she was also hurting and didn’t know what to do with a husband who had lost his passion. “During our retreat,” says Jerry, “Renee’s prayer was ‘I just want my husband back.’ I really didn’t have any idea how low I had gotten.

“While Renee had a prayer, mine was more like a frustrated longing than a prayer. I didn’t know what to ask for because I didn’t know what was even possible.”

At the end of their retreat, Jerry says he didn’t get “all fixed up,” but that the Lord did use the retreat to start a new journey within him. “I began to heal,” says Jerry, describing his post-retreat experience.

“Now, as we work with clergy from all kinds of backgrounds and situations, our own story gives us a lot of grace for others,” he concludes.

The ministry retreat at Kerith Creek has three main components. First, there is a lot of unscheduled time. This gives attendees an opportunity to pause the constant hustle and bustle that often fills leadership life, thus creating space for them to think with clarity. “It often takes a few days before our guests adjust to not rushing around and to begin feeling like they can communicate with their spouse again,” says Jerry. “This is a big reason why a retreat is seven days and not just three or four days.”

Group teachings comprise the second component of the retreat. Jerry and Renee lead the attendees through a time of looking at the common challenges and life issues related to being in ministry, such as high expectations, stress and being overly busy.

For the third and final component, Jerry and Renee meet with each person or couple during a private counselling session three times during the week. “This gives them an opportunity to work through some of the things which are foremost on our guest’s mind,” says Jerry. “Topics that often come up are marriage communication, burnout and depression, conflict in the ministry, the messages we’ve carried since childhood, and losses.

“For one couple we recently followed up with, the wife told us that she felt like we ‘pushed all her buttons – but in a good way.’ Her husband told us that it was a relief to feel like he didn’t have to live up to all the expectations in ministry.”

It is amazing what the Lord does when church leaders finally slow down enough to listen to both what God has to say to them and what is going on in our heart. “It seems that creating space for people to reflect and rest gives God the opportunity to heal,” says Jerry.

“One of the more meaningful times is when we gather together later in the week for a relaxed time of worship and communion,” says Jerry. “Renee and I are often in tears as we watch couples kneel together in prayer. While we are privy to their struggles, it’s often so encouraging to see them bring their needs to the Lord together. Many couples serve the Lord together, but most do not make time to pray together. This can be a intimidating time for them, but it often ends in a greater degree of closeness.”

For approximately one year after guests attend a retreat, Jerry and Renee commit to pray for each guest and follow up with them on the new directions they feel they need to take. This is an important part of solidifying and reinforcing areas of growth. Jerry and Renee’s greatest hope is that a retreat shapes future growth.

“When Renee and I were at our own retreat years ago,” says Jerry, “Renee noticed that I laughed for the first time in many months. When that happened, she realized the Lord was beginning to answer her prayers. I was again beginning to see that the Lord hadn’t given up on me, and I was heading into a whole new chapter of life. The journey we’ve been on since that day has been difficult but life-giving.”

Visit Kerithcreek.com for more information and upcoming retreat dates.

© 2012 Focus on the Family (Canada) Association. All rights reserved.