The Clergy Care Network enjoyed having Megan, a student from Trinity Western University, intern with us for several months. As part of her work here, she interviewed a pastor’s wife, Sarah*. Perhaps you can relate to Sarah’s experiences.
Sarah is a pastor’s wife from Ontario. She and her husband, Scott*, have been married for nine years and they have two young boys. Sarah enjoys having people over for barbeques in the summer.
- What is your husband’s position?
My husband is the assistant pastor at a Pentecostal church in Ontario.
- How do you balance being a wife, mother and leader in the church?
Trying to keep my priorities straight helps me stay balanced. Although God is first in my life, my husband’s and kids’ needs come before the church. God . . . husband . . . family. . . church . . . me.
- What kind of boundaries do you set when it comes to involvement in the church?
One of the main things we do is to keep our dinnertime as our family time each day. We don’t answer the phone, and we are all around the table eating together. I do my best to be involved where I can, but I have to consider my kids’ schedules now, especially since my oldest son is in school.
- How do you find time for self-care, and what does that look like?
I have to admit this is an area that I have to work on. I tend to take care of everyone else’s needs first and then, most times, I am too tired to do anything “special” for myself.
- Do you have a separate view of your husband as your pastor, or is he always your husband first?
He is always my husband first, but I do love to listen to him preach and teach. God has given him a lot of wisdom for a young man, and I always learn so much from him.
- Do you have a support system?
No, not as much as I would like. My family doesn’t live close by, so that is hard.
- Do you have a career? If so, does that hinder your church involvement?
I did work at the church office and I felt that it helped me be involved with church, rather than hinder. Now I stay at home with my kids and I am running a home daycare. Again, with church involvement, I have to prioritize.
- Do you feel that being a pastor’s wife was God’s calling in your life?
Yes, I believe God has called me to support my husband in whatever he does.
- Do you have any advice for newlywed pastoral couples?
Always put God first in your relationship and always keep that the main thing. Talk openly and often!
*Names have been changed for privacy purposes. |
